{"id":57291,"date":"2025-10-27T20:54:38","date_gmt":"2025-10-27T16:54:38","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/azerbaycan.media\/?p=57291"},"modified":"2025-10-27T20:54:38","modified_gmt":"2025-10-27T16:54:38","slug":"ziyadxan-budaq-q%c9%99l%c9%99min%c9%99-%c9%99d%c9%99bi-b%c9%99dii-baxis","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/azerbaycan.media\/?p=57291","title":{"rendered":"Ziyadxan Budaq q\u0259l\u0259min\u0259 \u0259d\u0259bi-b\u0259dii bax\u0131\u015f\u00a0\u00a0"},"content":{"rendered":"
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H\u0259l\u0259 bilmir\u0259m<\/div>\n
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\u00dcst\u00fcmd\u0259n ke\u00e7\u0259n\u0259 zamanm\u0131 deyim?<\/div>\n
Tanr\u0131dan umdu\u011fum amanm\u0131 deyim?<\/div>\n
Yoxsa son taley\u0259 g\u00fcmanm\u0131 deyim?<\/div>\n
H\u0259l\u0259 bilmir\u0259m.<\/div>\n
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G\u00fcnl\u0259rim, aylar\u0131m su kimi ax\u0131r,<\/div>\n
Uzaqda olan\u0131m yax\u0131ndan bax\u0131r.<\/div>\n
Bu n\u0259dir, g\u00f6z\u00fcmd\u0259 \u015fim\u015f\u0259kmi \u00e7ax\u0131r?<\/div>\n
H\u0259l\u0259 bilmir\u0259m.<\/div>\n
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N\u0259 qorxunc g\u00f6r\u00fcn\u00fcr yar\u011fan\u0131n qa\u015f\u0131!<\/div>\n
Bu g\u00f6rk\u0259m – \u00e7iynimd\u0259 d\u0259yirman da\u015f\u0131.<\/div>\n
Yaza qovu\u015farm\u0131 \u00f6mr\u00fcm\u00fcn q\u0131\u015f\u0131?<\/div>\n
H\u0259l\u0259 bilmir\u0259m.<\/div>\n
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Buna \u015feir deyim, yoxsa \u015feriyyat?<\/div>\n
Yoxu\u015f bir h\u0259yatd\u0131r, eni\u015f bir h\u0259yat.<\/div>\n
G\u00f6r\u0259n yeridirmi s\u00f6yl\u0259yim :”heyhat!”<\/div>\n
H\u0259l\u0259 bilmir\u0259m.<\/div>\n
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Ya\u011f\u0131\u015fdan n\u0259m al\u0131r, buluddan k\u00fcl\u0259k,<\/div>\n
Baxma ki, qocal\u0131q bir ayr\u0131 m\u0259l\u0259k.<\/div>\n
Yoxsa bir t\u0259l\u0259dir, yoxsa bir k\u0259l\u0259k?<\/div>\n
H\u0259l\u0259 bilmir\u0259m.<\/div>\n
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Get – ged\u0259 add\u0131m da s\u00f6z\u00fcm\u0259 baxm\u0131r,<\/div>\n
\u00d6z x\u0259nc\u0259r ist\u0259yim q\u0131n\u0131ndan \u00e7\u0131xm\u0131r.<\/div>\n
Q\u0259z\u0259bim d\u00fcnyaya s\u0131\u011f\u0131r, ya s\u0131\u011fm\u0131r?<\/div>\n
H\u0259l\u0259 bilmir\u0259m.<\/div>\n
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Anam yox, d\u0259rdimi kim\u0259 s\u00f6yl\u0259yim?<\/div>\n
\u00dczg\u00fcn fikirl\u0259ri hara teyl\u0259yim?<\/div>\n
B\u0259lk\u0259 vaxt\u0131 tutub yoldan eyl\u0259yim?<\/div>\n
H\u0259l\u0259 bilmir\u0259m.<\/div>\n
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\u00c7\u0259kdiyim \u0259zabd\u0131r, \u0259ziyy\u0259tdir bu,<\/div>\n
\u00d6m\u00fcrd\u0259 bir t\u0259z\u0259 m\u0259ziyy\u0259tdir bu.<\/div>\n
Olmaya sonuncu v\u0259siyy\u0259tdir bu?<\/div>\n
H\u0259l\u0259 bilmir\u0259m.<\/div>\n
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Ziyadxan Budaq<\/div>\n
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Ziyadxan Buda\u011f\u0131n \u201cH\u0259l\u0259 bilmir\u0259m\u201d adl\u0131 bu poetik n\u00fcmun\u0259si insan ruhunun \u0259n d\u0259rin t\u0259b\u0259q\u0259l\u0259rind\u0259 dola\u015fan suallar\u0131n, h\u0259yat\u0131n m\u0259nas\u0131na y\u00f6n\u0259lmi\u015f s\u00fckutlu f\u0259ryadlar\u0131n ifad\u0259sidir. \u015eeir, ad\u0131ndan da g\u00f6r\u00fcnd\u00fcy\u00fc kimi, \u201cbilm\u0259m\u0259k\u201d \u00fcz\u0259rind\u0259 qurulmu\u015f bir f\u0259ls\u0259fi q\u0259libdir. Bu bilm\u0259m\u0259k \u2013 sad\u0259c\u0259 cavabs\u0131z suallar\u0131n \u00e7oxlu\u011fu deyil, h\u0259m d\u0259 insan\u0131n varl\u0131qla, zamanla, Tanr\u0131 il\u0259 m\u00fcnasib\u0259tind\u0259ki sars\u0131nt\u0131n\u0131n, qeyri-m\u00fc\u0259yy\u0259nliyin poetik simvoludur. \u015eair burada bilginin yoxlu\u011funu deyil, d\u0259rin idrak\u0131n ba\u015flan\u011f\u0131c\u0131n\u0131 ifad\u0259 edir, \u00e7\u00fcnki \u201ch\u0259l\u0259 bilmir\u0259m\u201d dem\u0259k \u2013 d\u00fc\u015f\u00fcnm\u0259yin davam etdiyini g\u00f6st\u0259rir. Birinci b\u0259ndd\u0259 \u201c\u00dcst\u00fcmd\u0259n ke\u00e7\u0259n\u0259 zamanm\u0131 deyim, Tanr\u0131dan umdu\u011fum amanm\u0131 deyim?\u201d misralar\u0131 insan\u0131n ke\u00e7mi\u015f\u0259 v\u0259 ilahi q\u00fcdr\u0259t\u0259 y\u00f6n\u0259l\u0259n suallar\u0131n\u0131n dramatik tonunu m\u00fc\u0259yy\u0259nl\u0259\u015fdirir. Burada zamanla Tanr\u0131 aras\u0131nda qalan bir ruhun \u00e7a\u015fq\u0131nl\u0131\u011f\u0131, insan\u0131n \u00f6z taleyin\u0259 y\u00f6n\u0259lik t\u0259slimiyy\u0259ti v\u0259 eyni zamanda \u00fcsyan\u0131 duyulur. \u201cYoxsa son taley\u0259 g\u00fcmanm\u0131 deyim?\u201d misras\u0131 is\u0259 h\u0259yat\u0131n n\u0259tic\u0259sin\u0259 deyil, yolun \u00f6z\u00fcn\u0259 y\u00f6n\u0259l\u0259n bir \u015f\u00fcbh\u0259ni ortaya qoyur \u2013 sanki \u015fair \u00fc\u00e7\u00fcn h\u0259yat bir cavabdan \u00e7ox, bitm\u0259y\u0259n bir sor\u011fudur. Sonrak\u0131 b\u0259ndl\u0259rd\u0259 bu f\u0259ls\u0259fi axar daha da d\u0259rinl\u0259\u015fir. \u201cG\u00fcnl\u0259rim, aylar\u0131m su kimi ax\u0131r\u201d dey\u0259 ba\u015flayan b\u0259ndd\u0259 h\u0259yat\u0131n ke\u00e7iciliyi, zaman\u0131n amans\u0131z ax\u0131\u015f\u0131 poetik su kimi \u015f\u0259ffaf v\u0259 t\u0259miz t\u0259svirl\u0259 ifad\u0259 edilir. \u201cBu n\u0259dir, g\u00f6z\u00fcmd\u0259 \u015fim\u015f\u0259kmi \u00e7ax\u0131r?\u201d sual\u0131 is\u0259 daxili oyan\u0131\u015f\u0131n, ruhani silk\u0259l\u0259nm\u0259nin g\u00f6st\u0259ricisidir. Ziyadxan Budaq bu suallarla oxucunu h\u0259m d\u00fc\u015f\u00fcnm\u0259y\u0259, h\u0259m d\u0259 \u00f6z i\u00e7 d\u00fcnyas\u0131na baxma\u011fa vadar edir. \u201cN\u0259 qorxunc g\u00f6r\u00fcn\u00fcr yar\u011fan\u0131n qa\u015f\u0131!\u201d b\u0259ndind\u0259 is\u0259 h\u0259yat\u0131n t\u0259hl\u00fck\u0259li s\u0259rh\u0259di, \u00f6l\u00fcm\u00fcn v\u0259 ya sonun simvolu kimi g\u00f6r\u00fcn\u0259n \u201cyar\u011fa\u201d obraz\u0131 il\u0259 qar\u015f\u0131la\u015f\u0131r\u0131q. \u015eairin \u201cYaza qovu\u015farm\u0131 \u00f6mr\u00fcm\u00fcn q\u0131\u015f\u0131?\u201d sual\u0131 insan\u0131n \u00fcmidl\u0259 \u00fcmidsizlik aras\u0131nda qalan psixoloji hal\u0131n\u0131 ifad\u0259 edir \u2013 bu, ya\u015flanman\u0131n v\u0259 \u00f6mr\u00fcn pay\u0131z\u0131ndan yaz\u0131na ke\u00e7m\u0259k arzusunun, y\u0259ni yenil\u0259nm\u0259k ist\u0259yinin poetik t\u0259c\u0259ss\u00fcm\u00fcd\u00fcr. D\u00f6rd\u00fcnc\u00fc b\u0259ndd\u0259 Ziyadxan Budaq poetik m\u0259tnin \u00f6z mahiyy\u0259tini sor\u011fulay\u0131r: \u201cBuna \u015feir deyim, yoxsa \u015feriyyat?\u201d \u2013 bu, yarad\u0131c\u0131l\u0131\u011f\u0131n v\u0259 h\u0259yat\u0131n bir n\u00f6v birl\u0259\u015fm\u0259si kimi q\u0259bul oluna bil\u0259r. \u201cYoxu\u015f bir h\u0259yatd\u0131r, eni\u015f bir h\u0259yat\u201d misras\u0131 insan \u00f6mr\u00fcn\u00fcn d\u0259yi\u015fk\u0259nliyini, h\u0259yat\u0131n \u0259zab v\u0259 rahatl\u0131q aras\u0131nda ke\u00e7\u0259n d\u00f6vrl\u0259rini \u00fcmumil\u0259\u015fdirir. \u201cH\u0259l\u0259 bilmir\u0259m\u201d ifad\u0259si is\u0259 bu eni\u015f-yoxu\u015flara baxmayaraq insan\u0131n cavabs\u0131zl\u0131q i\u00e7ind\u0259 qalmas\u0131n\u0131 g\u00f6st\u0259rir. \u015eairin fikrind\u0259 qocal\u0131q da bir m\u0259l\u0259k kimi t\u0259qdim olunur: \u201cBaxma ki, qocal\u0131q bir ayr\u0131 m\u0259l\u0259k\u201d \u2013 bu, qocal\u0131\u011f\u0131n \u0259zab\u0131ndan \u00e7ox, onun hikm\u0259t v\u0259 ilahi yax\u0131nl\u0131qla ba\u011fl\u0131 t\u0259bi\u0259tini sezdirir. Amma n\u00f6vb\u0259ti s\u0259tirl\u0259rd\u0259 \u201cYoxsa bir t\u0259l\u0259dir, yoxsa bir k\u0259l\u0259k?\u201d dey\u0259r\u0259k yenid\u0259n insan \u015f\u00fcbh\u0259sin\u0259 qay\u0131d\u0131r. Burada Ziyadxan Buda\u011f\u0131n poetik d\u00fcnyas\u0131 dual v\u0259 ironik bir t\u0259bi\u0259t qazan\u0131r \u2013 o, h\u0259m inan\u0131r, h\u0259m d\u0259 soru\u015fur; h\u0259m q\u0259bul edir, h\u0259m d\u0259 \u00fcsyan edir. \u201cAnam yox, d\u0259rdimi kim\u0259 s\u00f6yl\u0259yim?\u201d misras\u0131 \u015feirin emosional zirv\u0259sidir. Anan\u0131n yoxlu\u011fu burada t\u0259kc\u0259 bir insan itkisi deyil, h\u0259m d\u0259 ruhi dayaqs\u0131zl\u0131\u011f\u0131n, t\u0259nhal\u0131\u011f\u0131n simvoludur. \u015eairin \u201cB\u0259lk\u0259 vaxt\u0131 tutub yoldan eyl\u0259yim?\u201d sual\u0131, zaman\u0131n amans\u0131z axar\u0131n\u0131 d\u0259yi\u015fdirm\u0259y\u0259 \u00e7al\u0131\u015fan insan\u0131n \u00fcmidli \u00e7ar\u0259sizliyini ifad\u0259 edir. Son b\u0259ndd\u0259 is\u0259 \u201cOlmaya sonuncu v\u0259siyy\u0259tdir bu?\u201d misras\u0131 il\u0259 \u015feir \u00f6z poetik qapan\u0131\u015f\u0131n\u0131 tap\u0131r. Bu, h\u0259yatla \u00f6l\u00fcm aras\u0131nda yaz\u0131lm\u0131\u015f bir yekun kimi s\u0259sl\u0259nir, lakin \u201cH\u0259l\u0259 bilmir\u0259m\u201d dey\u0259r\u0259k \u015fair \u00f6l\u00fcm\u0259 d\u0259, sonlu\u011fa da q\u0259ti cavab vermir. Ziyadxan Buda\u011f\u0131n bu \u0259s\u0259ri bir n\u00f6v insan ruhunun hesabat\u0131d\u0131r \u2013 cavablar\u0131 olmayan, amma cavab axtar\u0131\u015f\u0131n\u0131n \u00f6z\u00fcn\u00fc m\u0259naya \u00e7evir\u0259n poetik hesabat. Onun suallar\u0131 oxucuya d\u0259ym\u0259d\u0259n ke\u00e7mir; \u0259ksin\u0259, oxucunun daxilind\u0259 bir s\u00fckut yarad\u0131r v\u0259 bu s\u00fckutun i\u00e7ind\u0259 h\u0259r k\u0259s \u00f6z \u201ch\u0259l\u0259 bilmir\u0259m\u201dini tap\u0131r. \u015eeir bir t\u0259r\u0259fd\u0259n t\u0259nhal\u0131\u011f\u0131n, itkinin, zaman\u0131n qar\u015f\u0131s\u0131nda acizliyin f\u0259ls\u0259fi etiraf\u0131d\u0131r, dig\u0259r t\u0259r\u0259fd\u0259n is\u0259 h\u0259l\u0259 d\u0259 d\u00fc\u015f\u00fcn\u0259n, h\u0259l\u0259 d\u0259 inanan, h\u0259l\u0259 d\u0259 \u00fcmid ed\u0259n insan\u0131n dir\u0259ni\u015fidir. Bu bax\u0131mdan \u201cH\u0259l\u0259 bilmir\u0259m\u201d h\u0259m bir etiraf, h\u0259m bir dua, h\u0259m d\u0259 insan\u0131n varl\u0131q qar\u015f\u0131s\u0131nda s\u00f6nm\u0259y\u0259n mara\u011f\u0131n\u0131n \u2013 poetik h\u0259yat e\u015fqinin t\u0259c\u0259ss\u00fcm\u00fcd\u00fcr.<\/div>\n
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M\u00fc\u0259llif: Sevil Azadq\u0131z\u0131\u00a0<\/strong><\/span><\/div>\n
\u00a0Az\u0259rbaycan dili v\u0259 \u0259d\u0259biyyat\u0131 m\u00fc\u0259llimi. Filoloq. \u018fd\u0259bi t\u0259hlil-t\u0259nqid\u00e7i. \u015eair- publisist.\u00a0<\/strong><\/span><\/div>\n
\u00a0 \u00a0 \u00a0 27.10.2025<\/strong><\/span><\/div>\n
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M\u0259nb\u0259: Az\u0259rbaycan.media<\/strong><\/span><\/div>\n<\/div>\n<\/div>\n<\/div>\n
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H\u0259l\u0259 bilmir\u0259m \u00dcst\u00fcmd\u0259n ke\u00e7\u0259n\u0259 zamanm\u0131 deyim? Tanr\u0131dan umdu\u011fum amanm\u0131 deyim? Yoxsa son taley\u0259 g\u00fcmanm\u0131 deyim? H\u0259l\u0259 bilmir\u0259m. G\u00fcnl\u0259rim, aylar\u0131m su kimi ax\u0131r, Uzaqda olan\u0131m yax\u0131ndan bax\u0131r. Bu n\u0259dir, g\u00f6z\u00fcmd\u0259 \u015fim\u015f\u0259kmi… <\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":4,"featured_media":55417,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[54],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-57291","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-kos"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/azerbaycan.media\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/57291","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/azerbaycan.media\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/azerbaycan.media\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/azerbaycan.media\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/4"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/azerbaycan.media\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=57291"}],"version-history":[{"count":2,"href":"https:\/\/azerbaycan.media\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/57291\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":57293,"href":"https:\/\/azerbaycan.media\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/57291\/revisions\/57293"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/azerbaycan.media\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/media\/55417"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/azerbaycan.media\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=57291"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/azerbaycan.media\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=57291"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/azerbaycan.media\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=57291"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}