{"id":56330,"date":"2025-10-20T12:37:27","date_gmt":"2025-10-20T08:37:27","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/azerbaycan.media\/?p=56330"},"modified":"2025-10-20T12:37:46","modified_gmt":"2025-10-20T08:37:46","slug":"elnar%c9%99-akimova-ed%c9%99biyyatda-oz-hekay%c9%99mi-yazmagi-bacarmisam-musahib%c9%99","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/azerbaycan.media\/?p=56330","title":{"rendered":"Elnar\u0259 Akimova:\u00a0\u201c\u018fd\u0259biyyatda \u00f6z hekay\u0259mi yazma\u011f\u0131 bacarm\u0131\u015fam…\u201d\u00a0– M\u00fcsahib\u0259"},"content":{"rendered":"

H\u0259yat\u0131n b\u00fct\u00fcn sah\u0259l\u0259rind\u0259 z\u0259rifliyi, estetik duyumu, g\u00f6z\u0259lliyi, m\u00fcbarizliyi, sevgisi, m\u0259rh\u0259m\u0259ti, ruhani m\u00fcdrikliyi v\u0259 \u00f6z\u00fcn\u0259m\u0259xsus, \u0259v\u0259zedilm\u0259z toxunu\u015fu il\u0259\u00a0Qad\u0131n Var<\/strong>…<\/em><\/p>\n

\u201cQad\u0131nVari\u201d layih\u0259si qad\u0131nlar\u0131n m\u00fcxt\u0259lif sah\u0259l\u0259rd\u0259ki f\u0259aliyy\u0259tini daha qad\u0131nsaya\u011f\u0131 aspektd\u0259n t\u0259qdim etm\u0259yi qar\u015f\u0131s\u0131na m\u0259qs\u0259d qoyur.<\/p>\n

Bu, qad\u0131n d\u00fcnyas\u0131n\u0131n d\u0259rin qatlar\u0131na y\u00f6n\u0259lmi\u015f m\u0259n\u0259vi v\u0259 intellektual bir s\u0259yah\u0259tdir.<\/em><\/p>\n

Bu s\u0259yah\u0259td\u0259 ilk yol yolda\u015f\u0131m is\u0259 \u0259d\u0259biyyat\u0131n sehrin\u0259 k\u00f6n\u00fcld\u0259n ba\u011fl\u0131 olan, tan\u0131nm\u0131\u015f \u0259d\u0259biyyat\u015f\u00fcnas alim, Mill\u0259t v\u0259kili Elnar\u0259 Akimovad\u0131r.<\/em><\/p>\n

Onunla \u015f\u0259h\u0259rin m\u0259\u015fhur kitab ma\u011fazalar\u0131ndan birind\u0259, kitab qoxusunun q\u0259hv\u0259 \u0259trin\u0259 qar\u0131\u015fd\u0131\u011f\u0131 g\u00fcn\u0259\u015fli bir pay\u0131z s\u0259h\u0259rind\u0259 g\u00f6r\u00fc\u015f\u00fcb s\u00f6hb\u0259tl\u0259\u015fmi\u015fik.<\/em><\/p>\n

H\u0259ms\u00f6hb\u0259timl\u0259 \u00f6z t\u0259birinc\u0259 des\u0259k, \u201c\u0259d\u0259biyyatla\u015fm\u0131\u015f ruhla ya\u015famaq\u201d anlay\u0131\u015f\u0131na qad\u0131nvari bax\u0131\u015f buca\u011f\u0131ndan n\u0259z\u0259r sal\u0131b mahiyy\u0259tin\u0259 varma\u011fa \u00e7al\u0131\u015fm\u0131\u015f\u0131q.<\/p>\n

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– S\u00f6hb\u0259timiz\u0259 uzaq u\u015faql\u0131q xatir\u0259l\u0259rind\u0259n v\u0259 arzular\u0131ndan ba\u015flayaq\u2026<\/strong><\/p>\n

– U\u015faql\u0131qda \u0259sas fikrim \u00e7ox oxumaq, yax\u015f\u0131 t\u0259hsil almaq olub. Arzular, \u00fcmidl\u0259r, x\u0259yallar, b\u00fct\u00fcn bunlar daha \u00e7ox g\u0259nclik d\u00f6n\u0259mind\u0259 formala\u015f\u0131r. H\u0259yata daha parlaq yana\u015f\u0131r\u0131q, el\u0259 d\u00fc\u015f\u00fcn\u00fcr\u00fck ki, h\u0259r \u015fey ist\u0259diyimiz kimi olacaq\u2026 B\u0259lk\u0259 d\u0259 bu fikir bir az da u\u015faql\u0131\u011f\u0131n nec\u0259 ke\u00e7m\u0259yind\u0259n qaynaqlan\u0131r. M\u0259n m\u00fck\u0259mm\u0259l u\u015faql\u0131q ya\u015fam\u0131\u015fam, \u00e7ox g\u00f6z\u0259l atmosfer olub evimizd\u0259. O q\u0259d\u0259r dol\u011fun, r\u0259ngar\u0259ng u\u015faql\u0131q ke\u00e7irmi\u015f\u0259m ki…<\/p>\n

U\u015faql\u0131\u011f\u0131ma d\u00f6n\u00fcb n\u0259z\u0259r salanda g\u00f6r\u00fcr\u0259m ki, z\u0259rr\u0259 q\u0259d\u0259r travmam olmay\u0131b. Ail\u0259d\u0259 alt\u0131 u\u015faq olmu\u015fuq \u2013 d\u00f6rd bac\u0131, iki qarda\u015f. Halal ruzi il\u0259 b\u00f6y\u00fcm\u00fc\u015f\u00fck, ancaq ona k\u00f6kl\u0259nmi\u015fik ki, d\u00fczg\u00fcn t\u0259rbiy\u0259, t\u0259hsil alaq.<\/p>\n

M\u0259n 1995-ci ild\u0259 universitet\u0259 q\u0259bul oldum. Ail\u0259d\u0259 atam\u0131n yegan\u0259 ali t\u0259hsil alan \u00f6vlad\u0131 m\u0259n idim. O, m\u0259n\u0259 do\u011frulan \u00fcmidi kimi bax\u0131rd\u0131. U\u015faql\u0131q v\u0259 g\u0259nclik ill\u0259rim\u0259 boylananda ancaq sevgi, xo\u015fb\u0259xtlik dolu ke\u00e7mi\u015f g\u00f6r\u00fcr\u0259m.<\/p>\n

Atam f\u0259hl\u0259 idi, h\u0259ft\u0259nin be\u015f g\u00fcn\u00fc Sumqay\u0131t Boru-Prokat Zavodunda qaynar sexd\u0259 f\u0259hl\u0259 i\u015fl\u0259yirdi, \u015f\u0259nb\u0259-bazar is\u0259 evd\u0259 olurdu. O, \u015f\u0259nb\u0259-bazar g\u00fcnl\u0259ri dem\u0259k olar ki, h\u0259r h\u0259ft\u0259 bizi Bak\u0131ya \u2013 teatr tama\u015falar\u0131na, r\u0259ssamlar\u0131n s\u0259rgil\u0259rin\u0259, g\u0259zm\u0259y\u0259 apar\u0131rd\u0131\u2026 H\u0259rd\u0259n d\u00fc\u015f\u00fcn\u00fcr\u0259m ki, o vaxt atam iki g\u00fcnl\u00fck zaman aral\u0131\u011f\u0131nda bunu ed\u0259 bilirdi, amma indi biz \u00f6m\u00fcr qa\u00e7aqa\u00e7\u0131nday\u0131q sanki, \u00f6vladlar\u0131m\u0131za o diqq\u0259ti ver\u0259 bilmirik.<\/p>\n

– Anan\u0131z\u0131n v\u0259 yaxud h\u0259yat\u0131n\u0131zdak\u0131 qad\u0131nlar\u0131n siz\u0259 \u00f6t\u00fcrd\u00fcy\u00fc yaddaqalan qad\u0131nl\u0131q d\u0259rsi n\u0259 idi?<\/strong><\/p>\n

– \u018fslind\u0259, anamdan daha \u00e7ox atamdan \u00f6yr\u0259nmi\u015f\u0259m. H\u0259yat d\u0259rsl\u0259rini da, \u0259d\u0259biyyat sevgisini d\u0259, m\u00fctali\u0259 \u015f\u00f6vq\u00fcn\u00fc d\u0259 ondan g\u00f6t\u00fcrm\u00fc\u015f\u0259m. Anam m\u00fctali\u0259d\u0259n, kitabdan uzaq sad\u0259 ev qad\u0131n\u0131 idi. T\u00fcnd, \u00f6tk\u0259m xarakteri vard\u0131, amma \u00fcr\u0259yi su kimi duru idi. H\u0259mi\u015f\u0259 d\u00fc\u015f\u00fcnd\u00fcy\u00fcn\u00fc dey\u0259rdi, \u00fczd\u0259 bir c\u00fcr, arxada ba\u015fqa c\u00fcr deyildi. B\u0259z\u0259n deyirdim ki, \u201cfikirl\u0259\u015fdiyin h\u0259r \u015feyi dem\u0259, qar\u015f\u0131ndak\u0131 insan\u0131n x\u0259trin\u0259 d\u0259y\u0259 bil\u0259r\u201d. Cavab verirdi ki, \u201carxas\u0131nca dan\u0131\u015fsam, o zaman m\u0259n \u00f6z\u00fcm\u00fc narahat hiss ed\u0259c\u0259m, ondansa qoy el\u0259 \u00fcz\u00fcn\u0259 deyim\u201d. Riyakarl\u0131\u011f\u0131 q\u0259ti bacarm\u0131rd\u0131 v\u0259 bu, \u00f6z\u00fcn\u0259 o q\u0259d\u0259r xo\u015f g\u0259lirdi ki, qar\u015f\u0131s\u0131ndak\u0131 insan\u0131n onun haqq\u0131nda n\u0259 fikirl\u0259\u015fm\u0259si q\u0259ti maraql\u0131 deyildi.<\/p>\n

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– Qad\u0131n\u0131n \u0259n b\u00f6y\u00fck g\u00fcc\u00fc n\u0259dir?<\/strong><\/p>\n

– H\u0259r qad\u0131nda bu g\u00fcc m\u00fcxt\u0259lif ola bil\u0259r. M\u0259nim \u00fc\u00e7\u00fcn ail\u0259m v\u0259 \u00f6vladlar\u0131md\u0131r. Bir d\u0259 yaratmaq v\u0259 hiss etm\u0259k bacar\u0131\u011f\u0131! M\u0259nc\u0259, yaratmaq bacar\u0131\u011f\u0131 olanda qad\u0131n h\u0259m a\u011fr\u0131n\u0131, h\u0259m d\u0259 sevinci i\u00e7ind\u0259n ke\u00e7ir\u0259r\u0259k yenid\u0259n h\u0259yata \u00e7evirir. H\u0259r qad\u0131n i\u015f\u0131\u011f\u0131n\u0131 \u00f6z\u00fc tap\u0131r. M\u0259nim g\u00fcc istinad\u0131m \u00f6vladlar\u0131md\u0131r. Yoruldu\u011fum anlarda onlar\u0131n varl\u0131\u011f\u0131ndan g\u00fcc al\u0131ram. O\u011flum universitet\u0259 daxil olanda bir m\u00fcsahib\u0259md\u0259 demi\u015fdim ki, \u00f6vladlar\u0131ma \u0259n b\u00f6y\u00fck n\u00fcmun\u0259 \u00f6z\u00fcm olma\u011fa \u00e7al\u0131\u015fm\u0131\u015fam.<\/p>\n

Bu g\u00fcn d\u0259 onlar n\u0259d\u0259ns\u0259 yorulub, bezib \u015fikay\u0259t ed\u0259nd\u0259 onlara t\u0259lqin edir\u0259m ki, Allah insana bacarmad\u0131\u011f\u0131, g\u00fcc\u00fcnd\u0259n art\u0131q he\u00e7 n\u0259yi y\u00fckl\u0259mir. \u018fziyy\u0259tl\u0259r d\u0259, \u00e7\u0259tinlikl\u0259r d\u0259 insan \u00fc\u00e7\u00fcnd\u00fcr. Allah biz\u0259 o \u00e7\u0259tinliyi da\u015f\u0131maq g\u00fcc\u00fc veribs\u0259, dem\u0259li, h\u0259r \u015feyin \u00f6hd\u0259sind\u0259n g\u0259l\u0259 bil\u0259rik.<\/p>\n

\u2013 Ana olmaq qad\u0131nl\u0131q duy\u011fular\u0131n\u0131z\u0131 nec\u0259 d\u0259yi\u015fdirib, xarakterinizd\u0259ki hans\u0131 n\u00fcans\u0131 daha \u00f6n\u0259 \u00e7\u0131xard\u0131b?<\/strong><\/p>\n

– Dem\u0259zdim d\u0259yi\u015fdirdi, sad\u0259c\u0259 b\u0259zi duy\u011fular\u0131 daha \u00fcst s\u0259viyy\u0259y\u0259 qald\u0131rd\u0131. M\u0259n\u0259 el\u0259 g\u0259lir ki, ana olandan sonra art\u0131q h\u0259yata daha m\u0259suliyy\u0259tli, daha f\u0259dakar v\u0259 \u015f\u0259fq\u0259tli n\u0259z\u0259rl\u0259rl\u0259 baxma\u011fa ba\u015flay\u0131rsan. B\u0259lk\u0259 \u0259vv\u0259l m\u0259ni k\u00f6vr\u0259ltm\u0259y\u0259n n\u0259l\u0259rs\u0259, ana olandan sonra k\u00f6vr\u0259ltm\u0259y\u0259 ba\u015flad\u0131.<\/p>\n

Sosial \u015f\u0259b\u0259k\u0259d\u0259 u\u015faqlara qar\u015f\u0131 m\u00fc\u0259yy\u0259n qar\u015f\u0131durmalar, insidentl\u0259r qar\u015f\u0131ma \u00e7\u0131xanda \u00e7ox h\u0259ssas yana\u015f\u0131ram. Bir anl\u0131q d\u00fc\u015f\u00fcn\u00fcr\u0259m ki, bu, m\u0259nim \u00f6vlad\u0131m da ola bil\u0259rdi.<\/p>\n

\u00dc\u00e7 il \u0259vv\u0259l \u015ea\u011fan Olimpiya Kompleksind\u0259 yeniyetm\u0259 Turan R\u00fcst\u0259movun b\u0131\u00e7aqlan\u0131b \u00f6ld\u00fcr\u00fclm\u0259si videosundan o q\u0259d\u0259r sars\u0131lm\u0131\u015fd\u0131m ki, bir ne\u00e7\u0259 ay depressiyada olmu\u015fdum. Onun m\u0259hk\u0259m\u0259l\u0259rind\u0259 d\u0259 i\u015ftirak etdim, haqq davas\u0131 aparan insanlar\u0131n s\u0259sin\u0259 qo\u015fulub bir s\u0259s olma\u011fa \u00e7al\u0131\u015fd\u0131m. Turan\u0131n anas\u0131n\u0131, n\u0259n\u0259sini g\u00f6rm\u00fc\u015fd\u00fcm, ail\u0259 k\u0259d\u0259rd\u0259n darmada\u011f\u0131n olmu\u015fdu. Onda \u00f6z \u00f6vladlar\u0131m\u0131 bel\u0259 qucaqlaya bilmirdim ki, kimins\u0259 quca\u011f\u0131 indi bo\u015f qal\u0131b.<\/p>\n

D\u00fczd\u00fcr, h\u0259yatd\u0131r, bel\u0259 hadis\u0259l\u0259rin olmas\u0131 istisna edilmir. Ham\u0131s\u0131na m\u00fcnasib\u0259t bildir\u0259, reaksiya ver\u0259 bilmirik, amma d\u00fc\u015f\u00fcn\u00fcr\u0259m ki, m\u0259hz ana oldu\u011fuma g\u00f6r\u0259 bu c\u00fcr faci\u0259l\u0259ri daha d\u0259rind\u0259n ya\u015fay\u0131ram.<\/p>\n

Ana olandan sonra art\u0131q hissl\u0259rimizin m\u0259rk\u0259zind\u0259 \u00f6z\u00fcm\u00fcz\u00fc deyil, \u00f6vladlar\u0131m\u0131z\u0131 ya\u015fatmaq dayan\u0131r. Daha sakit, daha m\u00fcdrikc\u0259 yana\u015f\u0131r\u0131q h\u0259yata. B\u00fct\u00fcn add\u0131mlar\u0131m\u0131z\u0131 da, yax\u015f\u0131l\u0131qlar\u0131m\u0131z\u0131 da art\u0131q \u00f6vladlar\u0131m\u0131za g\u00f6r\u0259 m\u00fc\u0259yy\u0259nl\u0259\u015fdiririk.<\/p>\n

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– Qad\u0131n olmaqdan yorulanda bu \u201cy\u00fck\u201d\u00fc nec\u0259 y\u00fcng\u00fcll\u0259\u015fdirirsiniz?<\/strong><\/p>\n

– Daha \u00e7ox \u00f6z\u00fcml\u0259 t\u0259k qalma\u011f\u0131, \u00f6z\u00fcml\u0259 h\u0259sbi-hal etm\u0259yi sevir\u0259m. Bir fincan \u00e7ay v\u0259 \u00f6z s\u0259sini dinl\u0259m\u0259k \u00fc\u00e7\u00fcn susmaq m\u0259n\u0259 h\u0259dsiz y\u00fcng\u00fcll\u00fck g\u0259tirir. H\u0259rd\u0259n i\u015fin \u00e7oxlu\u011fundan bezib yoruldu\u011fum vaxtlar da olur.<\/p>\n

H\u0259tta el\u0259 olub ki, g\u00fcn \u0259rzind\u0259 3-4 a\u011f\u0131r t\u0259dbird\u0259 i\u015ftirak edir\u0259m, g\u0259rgin t\u0131xacda \u00e7\u0259tinlikl\u0259 Sumqay\u0131ta, ev\u0259 qay\u0131d\u0131ram. M\u0259nzil ba\u015f\u0131na \u00e7atmam\u0131\u015f el\u0259 yolda n\u00f6vb\u0259ti g\u00fcn \u00fc\u00e7\u00fcn z\u0259ngl\u0259r, d\u0259v\u0259tl\u0259r g\u0259lir. H\u0259min anda bir bezm\u0259 n\u00f6qt\u0259m olur. \u0130nsan dinc\u0259lm\u0259lidir ax\u0131. Amma inan\u0131n ki, ev\u0259 \u00e7atandan bir saat sonra \u00f6z\u00fcm-\u00f6z\u00fcm\u0259 \u0259mr edir\u0259m ki, dayanmaq, yorulmaq q\u0259ti qada\u011fand\u0131r. Missiyam\u0131z\u0131 l\u0259yaq\u0259tl\u0259 da\u015f\u0131mal\u0131y\u0131q. H\u0259m d\u0259 m\u0259n yor\u011funlu\u011fumu \u0259d\u0259biyyatla \u00e7\u0131xaran adamam. G\u00fcnd\u0259 n\u0259 is\u0259 oxumasam, o g\u00fcn m\u0259nim \u00fc\u00e7\u00fcn itirilmi\u015f say\u0131l\u0131r. \u0130\u015fin d\u0259 ki, h\u0259r zaman \u00e7\u0259tinin\u0259 qatla\u015fmaq, daha do\u011frusu s\u0131f\u0131rdan ba\u015flamaq kimi bir karman\u0131 ya\u015famaq olub taleyimd\u0259.<\/p>\n

– N\u0259 m\u0259nada?<\/strong><\/p>\n

– M\u0259s\u0259l\u0259n, akademiyan\u0131n \u018fd\u0259biyyat \u0130nstitutunun t\u0259nqid \u015f\u00f6b\u0259sind\u0259n u\u015faq \u0259d\u0259biyyat\u0131 \u015f\u00f6b\u0259sinin m\u00fcdirliyin\u0259 q\u0259d\u0259r. YAP \u0130dar\u0259 Hey\u0259tinin \u00fczvl\u00fcy\u00fcnd\u0259n Milli M\u0259clisin deputatl\u0131\u011f\u0131na q\u0259d\u0259r, \u00fcst\u0259lik, \u201c\u018fd\u0259biyyat q\u0259zeti\u201dnd\u0259 \u015f\u00f6b\u0259 m\u00fcdiriy\u0259m. Ham\u0131s\u0131 da f\u0259rqli yarad\u0131c\u0131l\u0131q predmetin\u0259 malik, yeni t\u0259dqiqat istiqam\u0259tl\u0259ri t\u0259l\u0259b ed\u0259n sah\u0259l\u0259r. M\u0259n d\u0259 ki, dayazl\u0131\u011f\u0131 sevm\u0259y\u0259n adam…<\/p>\n

Vaqif S\u0259m\u0259do\u011flunun \u015feirind\u0259 bel\u0259 misralar var: \u201cD\u0259rind\u0259 \u00fcz\u0259 bilmir\u0259m, \u00f6ls\u0259m, girm\u0259r\u0259m dayaza\u201d. He\u00e7 bir i\u015fd\u0259 yola verm\u0259yi, \u00fczd\u0259n getm\u0259yi, ba\u015fdansovdu yana\u015fma\u011f\u0131 bacarm\u0131ram. Bu, m\u0259nim qar\u015f\u0131mdak\u0131ndan daha \u00e7ox, \u00f6z\u00fcm\u00fcn \u00f6z\u00fcm\u0259 h\u00f6rm\u0259timdir.<\/p>\n

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– Niy\u0259 yorulanda \u00f6z\u00fcn\u00fcz\u0259 b\u0259z\u0259n d\u0259 n\u0259yis\u0259 buraxma\u011fa, lap el\u0259 h\u0259rd\u0259n s\u0259hv el\u0259m\u0259y\u0259 icaz\u0259 vermirsiniz?<\/strong><\/p>\n

– El\u0259 bilir\u0259m ki, daha s\u0259hv el\u0259m\u0259y\u0259 haqq\u0131m yoxdur. Ad\u0131m \u0259d\u0259biyyatda ciddi bir imza kimi tan\u0131n\u0131b. H\u0259mi\u015f\u0259 d\u00fc\u015f\u00fcnm\u00fc\u015f\u0259m ki, m\u0259ni sev\u0259nl\u0259r \u00f6z sevgil\u0259rini, say\u011f\u0131lar\u0131n\u0131 avans kimi verirl\u0259r, m\u0259n d\u0259 bu sevgiy\u0259 layiq \u00f6m\u00fcr s\u00fcrm\u0259liy\u0259m, yaln\u0131z imzam\u0131n ciddiyy\u0259tini qorumaqla o sevgini qaytara bil\u0259r\u0259m. \u0130ndi d\u0259 mill\u0259t v\u0259kili kimi ali status da\u015f\u0131y\u0131ramsa, daim m\u0259n\u0259vi v\u0259 ictimai borc narahatl\u0131\u011f\u0131n\u0131n i\u00e7ind\u0259y\u0259m. M\u0259n\u0259 h\u0259val\u0259 olunmu\u015f b\u00fct\u00fcn etimadlar\u0131 do\u011frultmal\u0131yam.<\/p>\n

– H\u0259yatda \u0259n \u00e7ox hans\u0131 ki\u015fid\u0259n \u00f6yr\u0259nmisiniz?<\/strong><\/p>\n

– H\u0259yatda \u0259n \u00e7ox \u00f6yr\u0259ndiyim ki\u015fi \u2013 atamd\u0131r. 2022-ci ild\u0259 v\u0259fat ets\u0259 d\u0259, yadda\u015f\u0131mda o q\u0259d\u0259r diridir ki, m\u0259n onun yoxlu\u011funu hiss etmir\u0259m. Onun \u00f6t\u00fcrd\u00fcy\u00fc sevgi, \u0259xlaq kodeksi, h\u0259yat\u0131ma, ruhuma olan toxunu\u015flar\u0131 m\u0259n\u0259 bir \u00f6m\u00fcr b\u0259s ed\u0259c\u0259k. Atam 90-c\u0131 ill\u0259rin \u00e7\u0259tin d\u00f6vrl\u0259rind\u0259 \u2013 fabrik v\u0259 zavodlar\u0131n ba\u011fland\u0131\u011f\u0131, i\u015fsizliyin ba\u015flad\u0131\u011f\u0131 \u00e7\u0259tin d\u00f6n\u0259ml\u0259rd\u0259 m\u0259ni oxudub. H\u0259min vaxtlarda onun \u0259ziyy\u0259tinin qar\u015f\u0131l\u0131\u011f\u0131n\u0131 n\u0259 il\u0259 qaytara bil\u0259rdim? Ancaq yax\u015f\u0131 oxumaqla, d\u00fcr\u00fcst ya\u015famaqla, ba\u015f\u0131n\u0131 uca el\u0259m\u0259kl\u0259. M\u0259nl\u0259 o q\u0259d\u0259r q\u00fcrur duyurdu ki… Amma f\u0259rqind\u0259 idi ki, \u00f6z\u00fc nec\u0259 m\u0259nim q\u00fcrur qayna\u011f\u0131md\u0131r, g\u00fcc\u00fcmd\u00fcr. \u0130ndi el\u0259 d\u00fc\u015f\u00fcn\u00fcr\u0259m ki, yax\u015f\u0131 ataya sahib olmaq q\u0131zlar\u0131 daha g\u00fcv\u0259nli, daha g\u00fccl\u00fc edir.<\/p>\n

Yax\u015f\u0131 valideyn \u00f6mr\u00fcn \u0259n g\u00f6z\u0259l m\u00fckafat\u0131d\u0131r. Bu sar\u0131dan \u00e7ox \u015fansl\u0131 olmu\u015fam. M\u0259n g\u00f6z\u00fcm\u00fc a\u00e7\u0131b evd\u0259 n\u0259h\u0259ng bir kitabxana g\u00f6rm\u00fc\u015f\u0259m. Atam \u00e7ox m\u00fctali\u0259li insan idi. Anar\u0131n, Sabir R\u00fcst\u0259mxanl\u0131n\u0131n, M\u00f6vlud S\u00fcleymanl\u0131n\u0131n o d\u00f6vrd\u0259 n\u0259\u015fr olunan b\u00fct\u00fcn yeni kitablar\u0131n\u0131 al\u0131rd\u0131, d\u00fcnya \u0259d\u0259biyyat\u0131 il\u0259 ba\u011fl\u0131 \u0259ks\u0259r yeni kitab v\u0259 jurnallar\u0131 tap\u0131b oxuyurdu. M\u0259n d\u0259 h\u0259v\u0259s\u0259 d\u00fc\u015f\u00fcb ham\u0131s\u0131n\u0131 oxuma\u011fa \u00e7al\u0131\u015f\u0131rd\u0131m. M\u0259kt\u0259bi bitirdikd\u0259n sonra filologiya ixtisas\u0131n\u0131 se\u00e7m\u0259yim d\u0259 m\u0259n\u0259 a\u015f\u0131lanm\u0131\u015f bu sevgid\u0259n idi.<\/p>\n

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– Qad\u0131nlar\u0131n daxili intuisiya g\u00fcc\u00fcn\u0259 inan\u0131rs\u0131n\u0131zm\u0131, \u201calt\u0131nc\u0131 hiss\u201dinizl\u0259 q\u0259rarlar vermisinizmi?<\/strong><\/p>\n

– \u0130ntuisiyam \u00e7ox g\u00fccl\u00fcd\u00fcr v\u0259 bu, m\u0259n\u0259 at\u0131lacaq hans\u0131sa add\u0131mlarda u\u011furlu b\u0259l\u0259d\u00e7ilik edir. \u018fslind\u0259, intuisiyama g\u00fcv\u0259nib verdiyim q\u0259rarlar daha \u00e7oxdur. \u00dcr\u0259yiml\u0259 beynim aras\u0131nda qalanda h\u0259mi\u015f\u0259 \u00fcr\u0259yim\u0259 g\u00fcv\u0259nmi\u015f\u0259m\u2026 \u00c7\u00fcnki intuisiyama sehr, yaxud t\u0259sad\u00fcfi bir n\u0259sn\u0259 kimi yox, t\u0259cr\u00fcb\u0259d\u0259n ke\u00e7mi\u015f hissl\u0259rimin yadda\u015f\u0131 kimi yana\u015fm\u0131\u015fam.<\/p>\n

– \u00dcr\u0259yiniz sizi \u201caya\u011fa verm\u0259yib\u201d?<\/strong><\/p>\n

– Ad\u0259t\u0259n, verm\u0259yib. Amma vers\u0259 bel\u0259, t\u0259\u0259ss\u00fcfl\u0259nm\u0259r\u0259m. B\u00fct\u00fcn y\u00fck\u00fcm\u00fcz\u00fc da\u015f\u0131y\u0131r, s\u0259hv ed\u0259nd\u0259 d\u0259 d\u00fcnya da\u011f\u0131lmaz…<\/p>\n

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– \u0130ndiki qad\u0131nlarda q\u0259bul etm\u0259diyiniz \u201crol\u201d hans\u0131d\u0131r?<\/strong><\/p>\n

– Bu g\u00fcn qad\u0131nlar\u0131n \u00fcz\u0259rin\u0259 \u00e7oxlu \u201crol\u201d y\u00fckl\u0259nib. O, h\u0259r \u015feyi bacarmal\u0131d\u0131r, h\u0259r yer\u0259 \u00e7atd\u0131rmal\u0131d\u0131r, h\u0259m i\u015fl\u0259m\u0259li, h\u0259m ana, h\u0259yat yolda\u015f\u0131 olmal\u0131, h\u0259m d\u0259 h\u0259r k\u0259sin daya\u011f\u0131na \u00e7evrilm\u0259lidir. Amma burada m\u0259nim q\u0259bul etm\u0259diyim bir h\u0259ssas m\u0259qam daha var. Qad\u0131nlar\u0131n \u00f6z\u00fc d\u0259 sanki bu g\u00fcn ayd\u0131n m\u00fc\u015fahid\u0259 olunan \u201crol d\u0259yi\u015fikliyi\u201dnd\u0259 m\u00fc\u0259yy\u0259n rol oynay\u0131rlar.<\/p>\n

Ekz\u00fcperinin bir fikri var: \u201cAh, qad\u0131nlar, qad\u0131nlar! Ki\u015fil\u0259rin ba\u015f\u0131n\u0131n tac\u0131 idiniz, o q\u0259d\u0259r dediniz ki, biz\u0259 azadl\u0131q, biz\u0259 azadl\u0131q, qoydular \u00f6z yanlar\u0131na, oldunuz onlar\u0131n tay\u0131…\u201d. Bu yumorda bir h\u0259qiq\u0259t pay\u0131 da var. C\u0259miyy\u0259td\u0259 \u0259ks\u0259r qad\u0131nlarda bir ki\u015fil\u0259\u015fm\u0259 gedir. Diqq\u0259t yetirin, art\u0131q \u201cqad\u0131n z\u0259rif m\u0259xluqdur\u201d kimi ifad\u0259l\u0259r \u00e7ox nadir hallarda i\u015fl\u0259nir. Qad\u0131n art\u0131q \u00f6z ist\u0259yil\u0259 z\u0259riflik sferas\u0131ndan \u00e7\u0131xaraq m\u0259nas\u0131z stereotipl\u0259rl\u0259 “silahlan\u0131r” v\u0259 c\u0259miyy\u0259td\u0259 bu c\u00fcr g\u00f6r\u00fcnm\u0259kd\u0259n h\u0259zz al\u0131r. \u018flb\u0259tt\u0259 ki, karyera v\u0259 t\u0259hsil qad\u0131n \u00fc\u00e7\u00fcn vacibdir, amma b\u00fct\u00fcn bunlarla b\u0259rab\u0259r, qad\u0131nl\u0131q \u201cm\u0259n\u201di itm\u0259m\u0259lidir.<\/p>\n

Az\u0259rbaycanda \u015e\u0259rq mentall\u0131\u011f\u0131 h\u0259l\u0259 d\u0259 m\u00f6vcuddur, bizim \u00fc\u00e7\u00fcn ail\u0259 kodu \u00e7ox \u00f6n\u0259mlidir. Qad\u0131n \u00f6z g\u00fcc\u00fcn\u0259 n\u0259l\u0259rs\u0259 ed\u0259 bil\u0259r, amma \u00f6z\u00fcn\u00fc a\u015fmamal\u0131, bunu c\u0259miyy\u0259t\u0259 n\u00fcmayi\u015f etdirm\u0259yi prioritet\u0259 \u00e7evirm\u0259m\u0259lidir. Qad\u0131n ki\u015fi kimi olanda deyil, \u00f6z\u00fc kimi qalma\u011f\u0131 bacaranda c\u0259sar\u0259tli g\u00f6r\u00fcn\u00fcr. S\u00fcsl\u0259nmi\u015f m\u00fck\u0259mm\u0259lliy\u0259 ehtiyac yoxdur.<\/p>\n

– Elm, \u0259d\u0259biyyat, siyas\u0259t, i\u015f, ail\u0259\u2026 Bir qad\u0131n olaraq b\u00fct\u00fcn bunlar\u0131 nec\u0259 uzla\u015fd\u0131r\u0131rs\u0131n\u0131z? Bu sah\u0259l\u0259rd\u0259n hans\u0131nda \u00f6z\u00fcn\u00fcz\u00fc daha rahat hiss edirsiniz?<\/strong><\/p>\n

– H\u0259r birind\u0259 m\u0259suliyy\u0259timi d\u0259rk edib \u00fcz\u0259rim\u0259 d\u00fc\u015f\u0259n missiyan\u0131n \u00f6hd\u0259sind\u0259n g\u0259lm\u0259y\u0259 \u00e7al\u0131\u015f\u0131ram. Amma \u0259d\u0259biyyatda \u00f6z\u00fcm\u00fc daha rahat hiss edir\u0259m. \u018fd\u0259biyyat m\u0259nim m\u0259n\u0259vi \u0259razimdir. Dig\u0259r sah\u0259l\u0259rd\u0259 v\u0259 m\u0259i\u015f\u0259td\u0259 yorulanda bel\u0259 g\u00fcc ald\u0131\u011f\u0131m sah\u0259 \u0259d\u0259biyyatd\u0131r.<\/p>\n

Bir var mexaniki m\u00fctali\u0259 ed\u0259s\u0259n, bir d\u0259 var oxuduqlar\u0131n\u0131 \u00f6z\u00fcnd\u0259n ke\u00e7ir\u0259s\u0259n \u2013 ona g\u00f6r\u0259 d\u0259 \u0259d\u0259biyyatdak\u0131 q\u0259hr\u0259manlar, obrazlar m\u0259nd\u0259 ya\u015fay\u0131rlar sanki, \u015f\u00fcuralt\u0131mda yurd sal\u0131blar. \u018flb\u0259tt\u0259 ki, \u0259d\u0259biyyat ilk n\u00f6vb\u0259d\u0259, m\u0259n\u0259vi ya\u015famd\u0131r.<\/p>\n

Biz onunla h\u0259m estetik platforma olaraq \u201csilahlan\u0131r\u0131q\u201d, h\u0259m d\u0259 onu h\u0259yat\u0131m\u0131z\u0131n bir par\u00e7as\u0131na \u00e7eviririk. \u018fd\u0259biyyatla\u015fm\u0131\u015f bir ruhla ya\u015famaq \u00e7ox g\u00f6z\u0259ldir…<\/p>\n

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– \u018fd\u0259biyyat\u015f\u00fcnas alim kimi el\u0259 olubmu ki, h\u0259rd\u0259n h\u0259yat\u0131n\u0131za da k\u0259nardan bir \u0259s\u0259r kimi yana\u015fas\u0131n\u0131z?..<\/strong><\/p>\n

– H\u0259yat\u0131m\u0131 bir \u0259s\u0259r kimi t\u0259svir ets\u0259m, y\u0259qin ki, hekay\u0259 janr\u0131 olar. Roman demir\u0259m, \u00e7\u00fcnki h\u0259r insan\u0131n h\u0259yat\u0131 romand\u0131r \u0259slind\u0259. Amma hekay\u0259 daha konkret detallara vur\u011fu edir. M\u0259n d\u00fc\u015f\u00fcn\u00fcr\u0259m ki, h\u0259r insan bu h\u0259yata \u00f6z hekay\u0259sini yazma\u011fa g\u0259lir. Siyas\u0259td\u0259 yeniy\u0259m, amma d\u00fc\u015f\u00fcn\u00fcr\u0259m ki, \u0259d\u0259biyyatda v\u0259 elmd\u0259 \u00f6z hekay\u0259mi yazma\u011f\u0131 bacarm\u0131\u015fam.<\/p>\n

– Sizc\u0259, \u201cQad\u0131nl\u0131q\u201d obraz\u0131n\u0131 simvoliz\u0259 etm\u0259k \u00fc\u00e7\u00fcn bir r\u0259ng, bir qoxu v\u0259 bir s\u0259s se\u00e7m\u0259li olsan\u0131z, bunlar n\u0259l\u0259r olard\u0131?<\/strong><\/p>\n

– M\u0259nim \u00fc\u00e7\u00fcn qad\u0131nl\u0131\u011f\u0131n r\u0259ngi m\u00fcxt\u0259lif m\u0259qamlara g\u00f6r\u0259 d\u0259yi\u015f\u0259 bil\u0259r. Sevdiyim r\u0259ng is\u0259 \u00e7\u0259hray\u0131d\u0131r.<\/p>\n

– Bu, b\u0259z\u0259n h\u0259yata da \u201c\u00e7\u0259hray\u0131 eyn\u0259k\u201dd\u0259n baxma\u011f\u0131n\u0131za g\u0259tirib \u00e7\u0131xarm\u0131r?<\/strong><\/p>\n

– H\u0259rd\u0259n \u201c\u00e7\u0259hray\u0131 eyn\u0259k\u201d taxmaq qa\u00e7\u0131lmaz olur. H\u0259yat\u0131n adiliyind\u0259n, bozlu\u011fundan t\u0259crid olunub int\u0259has\u0131zl\u0131\u011fa varmaq, m\u0259n\u0259vi-ruhsal d\u00fcnyam\u0131z\u0131n nikbinliyini ziddiyy\u0259tl\u0259r i\u00e7r\u0259 vurnuxan h\u0259yata q\u0259n\u015f\u0259r qoymaq \u00fc\u00e7\u00fcn\u2026<\/p>\n

– B\u0259s sevdiyiniz qoxu v\u0259 s\u0259s?<\/strong><\/p>\n

– Ya\u011f\u0131\u015fdan sonrak\u0131 n\u0259m torpa\u011f\u0131n qoxusu m\u0259nim \u00fc\u00e7\u00fcn \u0259n g\u00f6z\u0259lidir, amma qad\u0131nl\u0131\u011f\u0131n qoxusu deyirsinizs\u0259, yas\u0259m\u0259n \u0259tri… \u0130lk bax\u0131\u015fda sad\u0259, amma getdikc\u0259 d\u0259rinl\u0259\u015f\u0259n\u2026 S\u0259s kimi is\u0259, ya\u011f\u0131\u015f s\u0259si il\u0259 yanan oca\u011f\u0131n s\u0259sinin harmoniyas\u0131.<\/p>\n

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– B\u0259dii \u0259d\u0259biyyatdak\u0131 qad\u0131n q\u0259hr\u0259manlardan s\u00f6z d\u00fc\u015fm\u00fc\u015fk\u0259n, indiy\u0259 q\u0259d\u0259r oxudu\u011funuz hans\u0131 milli obraz siz\u0259 \u00f6z\u00fcn\u00fcz\u00fc xat\u0131rlad\u0131r?<\/strong><\/p>\n

– Maraql\u0131 suald\u0131r. M\u00fcxt\u0259lif situasiyalar v\u0259 f\u0259rqli qad\u0131n obrazlar\u0131 \u00fcz\u0259rind\u0259 fikr\u0259n g\u0259zi\u015fm\u0259l\u0259r edir\u0259m, amma iddial\u0131 s\u0259sl\u0259ns\u0259 d\u0259 deyim ki, m\u0259n \u00f6z\u00fcm\u00fc daha \u00e7ox yaz\u0131lmam\u0131\u015f bir \u0259s\u0259rin q\u0259hr\u0259man\u0131 kimi g\u00f6r\u00fcr\u0259m\u2026<\/p>\n

Son bir \u0259srin qad\u0131n obrazlar\u0131na baxsaq, \u0259srin \u0259vv\u0259ll\u0259rind\u0259 yarad\u0131lan qad\u0131nlar\u0131n \u0259ks\u0259riyy\u0259ti taleyin y\u00fck\u00fc alt\u0131nda \u0259zilmi\u015f, h\u0259r \u015fey\u0259 boyun \u0259y\u0259n, h\u00fcquqlar\u0131 \u0259ll\u0259rind\u0259n al\u0131nan m\u00fcti obrazlard\u0131r. Sonra sovet d\u00f6vr\u00fcn\u00fcn \u201cErk\u0259k T\u00fck\u0259zbanlar\u201d\u0131 g\u0259lir. Sonra Sa\u00e7l\u0131lar, S\u0259riyy\u0259l\u0259r… Daxili \u201cm\u0259n\u201di il\u0259 g\u00f6r\u00fcns\u0259 d\u0259, d\u00f6vr\u00fcn sosial t\u0259l\u0259bi il\u0259 yarad\u0131lm\u0131\u015f obrazlar… Daha sonra \u201cD\u0259li K\u00fcr\u201dd\u0259ki \u00fcst\u00fcn\u0259 qad\u0131n g\u0259tiril\u0259n qad\u0131n! Yen\u0259 d\u0259 m\u0259n\u0259n \u0259zil\u0259n, al\u00e7ald\u0131lan obrazlar. Ard\u0131nca \u201cT\u0259hmin\u0259\u201d g\u0259lir, o da ayr\u0131ca bir m\u0259rh\u0259l\u0259nin ba\u015flan\u011f\u0131c\u0131d\u0131r. Sonra da m\u00fcharib\u0259 v\u0259 qa\u00e7q\u0131nl\u0131q d\u00f6n\u0259mi… \u0130st\u0259s\u0259l\u0259r bel\u0259, yaz\u0131\u00e7\u0131lar\u0131m\u0131z q\u00fcrurlu qad\u0131n obraz\u0131 yarada bilm\u0259zdil\u0259r. Daim \u015fikay\u0259t ed\u0259n, nisgilli, torpa\u011f\u0131ndan, do\u011fma ail\u0259sind\u0259n uzaq d\u00fc\u015f\u0259n qad\u0131n obrazlar\u0131\u2026<\/p>\n

Bu \u0259d\u0259bi q\u0259hr\u0259manlar\u0131n he\u00e7 biri m\u0259ni ifad\u0259 el\u0259mir. \u0130ndi bunlar\u0131 dey\u0259rk\u0259n yenid\u0259n f\u0259rqin\u0259 var\u0131ram ki, Az\u0259rbaycan \u0259d\u0259biyyat\u0131nda \u00f6z\u00fcn\u0259m\u0259xsus, f\u0259rqli qad\u0131n obraz\u0131 \u00e7ox az yarad\u0131l\u0131b. Birc\u0259 H\u00fcseyn Cavidin b\u00fct\u00fcn qad\u0131n q\u0259hr\u0259manlar\u0131 sevgi doludur.<\/p>\n

– Qad\u0131n\u0131n \u0259d\u0259biyyatdak\u0131 yerind\u0259n dan\u0131\u015f\u0131r\u0131qsa, el\u0259 son d\u00f6vrl\u0259rd\u0259 polemikaya \u00e7evril\u0259n bir m\u0259s\u0259l\u0259 il\u0259 ba\u011fl\u0131 fikrinizi \u00f6yr\u0259nm\u0259k ist\u0259rdim. Sizc\u0259, qad\u0131n m\u00fc\u0259llifl\u0259r\u0259 m\u00fcnasib\u0259td\u0259 h\u0259qiq\u0259t\u0259n g\u00f6r\u00fcnm\u0259z baryerl\u0259r varm\u0131?<\/strong><\/p>\n

– M\u0259n \u015f\u0259xs\u0259n \u0259d\u0259bi m\u00fchitd\u0259 qad\u0131n yazarlara qar\u015f\u0131 h\u0259r hans\u0131 bir t\u0259zyiq, s\u0131x\u0131\u015fd\u0131rma, yaxud onlar\u0131 a\u015fa\u011f\u0131lama kimi hallarla qar\u015f\u0131la\u015fmam\u0131\u015fam. \u018fd\u0259biyyat yaz\u0131, fikir s\u0259n\u0259tidir v\u0259 \u00f6z fikri il\u0259 tan\u0131nmaq, g\u00f6r\u00fcnm\u0259k imkanlar\u0131, \u0259slind\u0259, h\u0259r k\u0259s \u00fc\u00e7\u00fcn a\u00e7\u0131qd\u0131r. \u018fn az\u0131 ist\u0259nil\u0259n k\u0259s \u00f6z\u00fcn\u00fcn \u201cFacebook\u201d s\u0259hif\u0259sind\u0259 m\u0259tnl\u0259ri, istedad\u0131 il\u0259 g\u00f6r\u00fcn\u0259 bilir. \u018fd\u0259bi m\u0259nz\u0259r\u0259y\u0259 n\u0259z\u0259r salsaq, qad\u0131n yazarlar\u0131m\u0131z\u0131n ortaya \u00e7\u0131xmas\u0131 v\u0259 q\u0259bul olunmas\u0131 bax\u0131m\u0131ndan 1990-c\u0131 ill\u0259rin sonu, 2000-ci ill\u0259rin \u0259vv\u0259ll\u0259ri f\u0259rqli bir d\u00f6vr idi.<\/p>\n

H\u0259min ill\u0259rd\u0259 N\u0259rmin Kamal, G\u00fcnel M\u00f6vlud, Sevinc Els\u0259v\u0259r kimi qad\u0131n imzalar \u0259d\u0259biyyatda f\u0259rdi yarad\u0131c\u0131l\u0131q \u00fcslublar\u0131 say\u0259sind\u0259 \u00f6n\u0259 \u00e7\u0131xa bildil\u0259r. Daha sonrak\u0131 m\u0259rh\u0259l\u0259d\u0259 is\u0259 R\u0259biq\u0259, Sevinc \u00c7\u0131l\u011f\u0131n, Xuraman H\u00fcseynzad\u0259, Aysel \u018flizad\u0259, Sevinc M\u00fcrv\u0259tq\u0131z\u0131, Elnaz Eyvazl\u0131, K\u00f6n\u00fcl Arif, sonradan Sahil\u0259 Yaya, Cavi Dan, H\u0259diyy\u0259 \u015e\u0259faq\u0259t, Samir\u0259 \u018f\u015fr\u0259f kimi imzalar \u0259d\u0259biyyata g\u0259ldi.<\/p>\n

Y\u0259ni qad\u0131n yazarlar h\u0259mi\u015f\u0259 g\u00f6r\u00fcn\u00fcb, sad\u0259c\u0259, say bax\u0131m\u0131ndan ki\u015fil\u0259r \u00fcst\u00fcnl\u00fck t\u0259\u015fkil etdikl\u0259rin\u0259 v\u0259 daha \u00e7ox topla\u015fmaq, bir araya g\u0259lm\u0259k imkanlar\u0131 oldu\u011funa g\u00f6r\u0259 onlar d\u0259st\u0259 \u015f\u0259klind\u0259 g\u00f6r\u00fcn\u00fcrl\u0259r. Qad\u0131n yaz\u0131\u00e7\u0131 h\u0259m t\u0259bi\u0259ti, h\u0259m d\u0259 c\u0259miyy\u0259tin ona y\u00fckl\u0259diyi \u00f6hd\u0259likl\u0259r\u0259 g\u00f6r\u0259 \u00e7evr\u0259 yarada bilmir. S\u0259h\u0259rl\u0259r i\u015f\u0259, ax\u015famlar ev\u0259 t\u0259l\u0259sir. Ki\u015fi yaz\u0131\u00e7\u0131 arxay\u0131nd\u0131r ki, evd\u0259 onu d\u0259st\u0259kl\u0259y\u0259n, ail\u0259, m\u0259i\u015f\u0259t y\u00fck\u00fcn\u00fc qar\u015f\u0131layan h\u0259yat yolda\u015f\u0131 var. Ona g\u00f6r\u0259 bir “\u00e7\u00f6l” estetikas\u0131 da yaratmaq imkanlar\u0131na sahib olurlar.<\/p>\n

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– \u00d6z\u00fcn\u00fcz\u00fcn sevdiyiniz v\u0259 xo\u015flamad\u0131\u011f\u0131n\u0131z x\u00fcsusiyy\u0259tiniz hans\u0131d\u0131r?<\/strong><\/p>\n

– Sevdiyim x\u00fcsusiyy\u0259tim \u00f6z\u00fcm olma\u011f\u0131m, he\u00e7 kimi t\u0259krarlamama\u011f\u0131md\u0131r. Sevm\u0259diyim x\u00fcsusiyy\u0259tim yoxdur, h\u0259r \u015fey m\u0259nd\u0259dirs\u0259, m\u0259n\u0259 tabedir dem\u0259k. Onu m\u0259n y\u00f6nl\u0259ndirir, idar\u0259 edir\u0259ms\u0259, dem\u0259k ki, i\u00e7im bel\u0259 diqt\u0259 edir. Sevm\u0259diyim n\u0259s\u0259 olsa d\u0259yi\u015f\u0259r\u0259m.<\/p>\n

– Hans\u0131 qada\u011fan\u0131 q\u0259bul etmirsiniz?<\/strong><\/p>\n

– \u201cTez qay\u0131t\u201d qada\u011fas\u0131n\u0131. Vaxt darl\u0131\u011f\u0131nda – h\u0259r i\u015f\u0259, h\u0259r t\u0259dbir\u0259 yeti\u015fm\u0259y\u0259 \u00e7al\u0131\u015fd\u0131\u011f\u0131m anda bu c\u00fcml\u0259ni e\u015fitm\u0259k m\u0259ni \u00f6z\u00fcmd\u0259n \u00e7\u0131xara bilir\u2026<\/p>\n

– Qad\u0131nlar aras\u0131nda b\u0259z\u0259n gizli bir \u201cr\u0259qab\u0259t\u201d olur. M\u0259\u015fhur bir deyimd\u0259 vur\u011fulan\u0131r ki, qad\u0131n qad\u0131n\u0131n qurdu da ola bil\u0259r, yurdu da… Sizin h\u0259yat\u0131n\u0131zda \u201cqurd olanlar\u201d \u00e7oxdur, yoxsa yurd ola bil\u0259nl\u0259r?<\/strong><\/p>\n

– Yurd ola bil\u0259nl\u0259rin say\u0131 azd\u0131r, amma onlar\u0131n m\u0259n\u0259vi g\u00fcc\u00fc o q\u0259d\u0259r b\u00f6y\u00fckd\u00fcr ki, lap Ximenesin dediyi kimi, \u201cucsuz-bucaqs\u0131z azl\u0131q\u201dd\u0131rlar. Onlarla az-az g\u00f6r\u00fc\u015fs\u0259m d\u0259, varl\u0131qlar\u0131ndan sonsuz g\u00fcc al\u0131ram. H\u0259r zaman deyir\u0259m, m\u0259nim \u00fc\u00e7\u00fcn \u0259n b\u00f6y\u00fck s\u0259rv\u0259t insanlar, qazand\u0131\u011f\u0131m dostlar, dostluqlard\u0131r. Bayaq intuisiya bar\u0259d\u0259 dan\u0131\u015fd\u0131q, m\u0259n el\u0259 \u0259vv\u0259ld\u0259n \u201cqurd olan\u201d\u0131 da, \u201cyurd olan\u201d\u0131 da tan\u0131m\u0131\u015fam. \u0130nsanlar\u0131n enerjisinin bir-biri il\u0259 uy\u011funla\u015fmas\u0131na inan\u0131ram. \u0130lk g\u00f6r\u00fc\u015fd\u0259 enerjim tutmayan adamla he\u00e7 bir halda g\u00f6r\u00fc\u015fm\u0259m\u0259y\u0259, \u00fcnsiyy\u0259t qurmama\u011fa \u00e7al\u0131\u015f\u0131ram. \u00d6m\u00fcr m\u0259nas\u0131z adamlara x\u0259rcl\u0259n\u0259c\u0259k q\u0259d\u0259r uzun deyil.<\/p>\n

R\u0259qab\u0259t deyirsiniz, \u0259d\u0259biyyata yeni g\u0259ldiyim vaxtlarda qad\u0131n r\u0259qab\u0259tini, \u00e7\u0259ki\u015fm\u0259sini daha \u00e7ox hiss edirdim. \u0130ndinin \u00f6z\u00fcnd\u0259 d\u0259 \u0259n \u00e7ox e\u015fitdiyim sual budur: \u201cNec\u0259 \u00e7atd\u0131r\u0131r?\u201d Bu sual, narahatl\u0131q ill\u0259rl\u0259 refren kimi s\u0259sl\u0259nib v\u0259 onu s\u0259sl\u0259ndir\u0259nl\u0259rd\u0259n x\u0259b\u0259rsiz m\u0259nim g\u00fcc qayna\u011f\u0131ma \u00e7evrilib. B\u0259li, \u00e7atd\u0131r\u0131ram! Ail\u0259ml\u0259 ke\u00e7ir\u0259c\u0259yim zamandan, enerjid\u0259n, g\u0259zintid\u0259n, istirah\u0259td\u0259n k\u0259sib oxuma\u011fa, yazma\u011fa vaxt ay\u0131rmaqla \u00e7atd\u0131r\u0131ram.<\/p>\n

Ham\u0131 \u015firin yuxuda ik\u0259n, m\u0259n klaviaturan\u0131n s\u0259sl\u0259ri il\u0259 gec\u0259nin qaranl\u0131\u011f\u0131n\u0131 adlay\u0131b g\u00fcn\u0259\u015fi salamlamaqla \u00e7atd\u0131r\u0131ram. \u00d6z d\u00fcnyama k\u00f6kl\u0259ndiyim\u0259 v\u0259 bu auran\u0131 t\u0259miz saxlad\u0131\u011f\u0131ma g\u00f6r\u0259 \u00e7atd\u0131r\u0131ram. Kainata \u00f6t\u00fcrd\u00fckl\u0259rimiz is\u0259 bumeranqd\u0131r, n\u0259 \u00f6t\u00fcr\u00fcr\u00fcks\u0259, biz\u0259 geri qay\u0131d\u0131r.<\/p>\n

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– Zahiri v\u0259 daxili bax\u0131mdan sizi \u201cm\u00fctl\u0259q qad\u0131n\u201d kimi hiss etdir\u0259n n\u00fcans n\u0259dir?<\/strong><\/p>\n

– M\u0259nc\u0259, qad\u0131n ondan h\u0259r k\u0259sin g\u00f6zl\u0259diyi kimi deyil, \u00f6z h\u0259qiq\u0259tl\u0259ri \u00e7\u0259r\u00e7iv\u0259sind\u0259 olduqda \u201cm\u00fctl\u0259q\u201d olur. Bu bax\u0131mdan, \u00f6z\u00fcn\u00fc ifad\u0259 t\u0259rzin\u0259 malik oldu\u011fumu bilir\u0259m. \u00d6z\u00fcm\u0259 inam\u0131m v\u0259 duru\u015fum m\u0259ni \u201cm\u00fctl\u0259q\u201d edir.<\/p>\n

– Sonda sizi u\u011fura aparan \u201cqad\u0131nvari\u201d sirrinizi bilm\u0259k ist\u0259rdik, h\u0259mcinsl\u0259riniz\u0259 n\u0259 dem\u0259k ist\u0259y\u0259rdiniz?<\/strong><\/p>\n

– Z\u0259hm\u0259t, \u00e7ox \u00e7al\u0131\u015fmaq, do\u011fru \u0259traf v\u0259 enerjiy\u0259 malik olmaq, kainat\u0131 sevm\u0259k v\u0259 \u00f6z g\u00fcc\u00fcn\u0259 inanmaq. Qad\u0131n\u0131n g\u00fcc\u00fc bunu ba\u015fqalar\u0131na isbat ed\u0259nd\u0259 deyil, \u00f6z\u00fc \u00fc\u00e7\u00fcn d\u0259rk etdiyind\u0259 yaran\u0131r. \u00d6z kimliyini, duy\u011fular\u0131n\u0131 d\u0259rk ed\u0259n qad\u0131n t\u0259sirl\u0259r, t\u0259zyiql\u0259r qar\u015f\u0131s\u0131nda m\u00fcvazin\u0259tini itirmir v\u0259 bu inam onun \u00fc\u00e7\u00fcn art\u0131q u\u011furlu bir h\u0259yat hekay\u0259si v\u0259d edir.<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

S\u00f6hb\u0259tl\u0259\u015fdi: Sevinc M\u00fcrv\u0259tq\u0131z\u0131<\/strong><\/span><\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

H\u0259yat\u0131n b\u00fct\u00fcn sah\u0259l\u0259rind\u0259 z\u0259rifliyi, estetik duyumu, g\u00f6z\u0259lliyi, m\u00fcbarizliyi, sevgisi, m\u0259rh\u0259m\u0259ti, ruhani m\u00fcdrikliyi v\u0259 \u00f6z\u00fcn\u0259m\u0259xsus, \u0259v\u0259zedilm\u0259z toxunu\u015fu il\u0259\u00a0Qad\u0131n Var… \u201cQad\u0131nVari\u201d layih\u0259si qad\u0131nlar\u0131n m\u00fcxt\u0259lif sah\u0259l\u0259rd\u0259ki f\u0259aliyy\u0259tini daha qad\u0131nsaya\u011f\u0131 aspektd\u0259n t\u0259qdim etm\u0259yi qar\u015f\u0131s\u0131na… <\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":4,"featured_media":56331,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[1,74],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-56330","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-manset","category-musahib"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/azerbaycan.media\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/56330","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/azerbaycan.media\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/azerbaycan.media\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/azerbaycan.media\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/4"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/azerbaycan.media\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=56330"}],"version-history":[{"count":3,"href":"https:\/\/azerbaycan.media\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/56330\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":56334,"href":"https:\/\/azerbaycan.media\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/56330\/revisions\/56334"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/azerbaycan.media\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/media\/56331"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/azerbaycan.media\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=56330"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/azerbaycan.media\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=56330"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/azerbaycan.media\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=56330"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}